I have been soaking for awhile in the "new" revelation that even if I sin, it does not negate the fact that Jesus already bore that sin for me, and that because He did that, every single sin committed past, present, or future is under His blood and completely and absolutely washed away, by His grace. The more I "try", the more I fail; the more I "trust" in a finished work, the more I am able to live sin free, because I live through Him and what He did. This new way of thinking is freeing me from useless and discouraging self-effort, and even from self-pride and anything related to self at all. It is because of Him and Him alone that I can call myself righteous. It is good to be released from the "law of faith", where I mistakenly felt that through my faith and trust in God, He would show me how and help me to be better.
It suddenly occurred to me today that I have also been putting myself under that same "law of faith" when it comes to healing from the frequent headaches I have been plagued with in recent years. Whenever a headache would occur, I felt pressure to "stand against it", "not accept it", and especially not to lean on the "arm of the flesh" (medications) to give me relief. I knew I wasn't spending the time necessary to build my faith by looking constantly to the Word, and I felt ashamed that I struggled with fully trusting in Jesus' healing, which I knew was, at least theoretically, mine. This was reinforced by the fact that I very, very often have successfully "taken a stand" verbally and with the Word against colds, the flu, and other aches and pains. But the headaches were always so debilitating, and I felt so sick, that I would "stand" for awhile and then give in, much to my shame, usually with a promise to God to "do better" next time. "Next time, I won't take medication! Next time, I'll stand on the Word even if I die! Next time, I'll honor what You did on the cross for me, Lord, I really will!" Then I would then go to my cupboard with my tail between my legs, take the medication, feel wonderful, thank God, and then worry about destroying my kidneys or liver from taking the pills so often. What a hated routine. What fear of encountering another attack (which I already knew would prove me a loser). I felt like a user of cocaine or like someone enslaved to alcohol. Same vicious cycle! I felt just like an addict!
But then, because the message of grace has so released me from my sin problem, I think the same message began to seep into my healing problem. It suddenly occurred to me that, no matter the physical symptoms, I am healed, just like, no matter if I sin or not, I am righteous! So, even if I have a headache, I'm healed! Even if I take medication, it doesn't change the fact that I'm healed! And furthermore, if I (take) "any deadly thing, it will not harm me" (Mark 16:18) That means, I need not worry about my kidneys or liver being destroyed. Whatever I do, I am healed! This is monumental! This is fabulous! This is life-changing!
If I sin, it doesn't matter, I'm still righteous. If I have a headache or take medication, it doesn't matter, I'm still healed! There is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus! He did a complete and finished work. "Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not ALL His benefits: Who forgives ALL your iniquities, Who heals ALL your diseases..." (Psalm 103:2,3) Oh, He is wonderful! Oh, He is amazing! Oh, praise Him, praise Him, praise Him, forever and ever and ever! He is sooooooooooo good, and He loves me!!!!
